Will You Always Hold My Hand?
by girlinterrupted22
Summary: Post Season 3.  S401.  Addison is gone from SGH, but she never made it to LA. Can anyone break through the shell that is left of a once strong woman? And what relationships will be standing in the aftershock? Rated for some violence.
1. The Beginning of Everything

It was all about the elevators. Always, at Seattle Grace, was it about the elevators. If there were major conversations to be had, they were in the elevator. That was, after all, why God invented the emergency stop button. Meredith Grey knew that better than anyone, so when Derek Shepherd stepped into the elevator on her first day of freedom from internship, well…It didn't exactly surprise her when he put that little red button to good use.

"It's so over," he said as Meredith focused on the floor. "It's so over? And then you don't talk to me for days? How could it be over?"

Meredith shook her head. "I don't know…I just…With my mother and Susan being gone…and you told me that if I wasn't in it to let you go, because you couldn't do it, and I'm not sure what I want, and I'm not sure I ever will be, and I..."

Derek held up a hand to stop her mid-ramble. "I love you, Meredith. And I can't accept over. I won't. Not again."

"Derek, I…"

He put up a hand again. "Now, I know you don't believe me right now when I say I love you. But I do. And when I thought you had drown…my heart broke. I was so afraid of losing you, so afraid…I…I thought you were running away from me."

"I know," she whispered. "And maybe I was. Maybe the thought of losing you scares me too."

Derek smiled. "Let me get this, now. You're afraid of losing me, and I'm terrified of losing you."

Meredith shrugged. "I guess," she said, twirling a strand of hair around her finger.

"So we go slow. One day at a time. One week at a time. And we get it right this time." Derek hit the button to make the elevator start up again. "We get it right this time."

Meredith reached out as the doors open and took his hand. "Okay. I think I like that."

"I'll always hold your hand, Meredith. I'll always be there. No matter what."

Together, they walked to the nurses station. Bailey was there, along with Izzie, Christina and Alex. "Five minutes ago, Grey. You should have been here five minutes ago. You're lucky I'm not your supervisor anymore."

Meredith pulled her hair into a ponytail as she hurried to her group.

"Today begins the rest of your careers," Bailey said. "And I taught you well. So show it. You will begin branching out into specialties, and you're going to spend your day with the rest of the residents."

Izzie rolled her eyes. "As long as it's not Sydney, I'm good," she whispered to Meredith.

Everyone else got their assignments, and Meredith was to report to the OB section. "Dr. Bailey, I'm with Dr. Montgomery, right?"

Bailey raised an eyebrow. 'Did you hear me say that, Grey?"

"No, I was just wondering."

"Because Addison is gone, Grey. She's not here anymore."


	2. I'm Okay, It's Okay, We're All Okay

**a.n.-I have taken a small amount of liberty, which I don't normally do, and I had Addison purchase a house in the vicinity of Meredith. (I don't normally do author's notes either, but this warranted it.) Enjoy!**

"She moved to LA?" Meredith asked, shocked.

"I guess," Bailey answered. "Her last day was last week. Not even a goodbye."

"But I don't think Addison's gone," Meredith insisted. "She lives right down the street from me. I've seen her car out front this weekend. I've seen lights on. I'm sure she's there. She wouldn't just leave. Would she?"

"Apparently. You two aren't exactly the best of friends though."

Meredith shrugged.

"Now get to work, Grey."

Meredith nodded, and jogged back to the elevator. Mashing her button, she turned around to find Cristina leaning on the railing.

"Hey, Mer."

"Hey."

"I'm okay," Cristina said. "I swear to God, if anyone else asks, I'll have to kill them. Slowly and painfully. With blood. I need blood."

"You need surgery," Meredith replied.

"That's for sure!" Cristina frowned. "Are you okay, Mer? You look like you're lost."

"Thinking."

"About,"

"You know the day that guy came in with the bomb in his body? And when I woke up that morning, I didn't want to come to work 'cause I knew something bad was going to happen?"

"Oh, God," Cristina sighed. "Tell me we're not going to blow up. Tell me it's Burke. He can have a bomb."

The two stepped out of the elevator. "No," Meredith said, "it's Addison."

"Huh?"

"Didn't you hear? She supposedly went to LA."

"Really? She left the lights on then, 'cause I've seen lights on at that house all weekend."

"Cristina, what if something's wrong?"

"What do you mean?"

"Add it up. I mean, she's supposed to be in LA, right? She's supposed to be moving?"

"I guess. Sure you're not overthinking this?"

"She's supposed to be gone," Meredith pushed, "but she left her car and her lights are on. What if something's wrong? What if something is really wrong, and nobody noticed because she isn't even supposed to be here?"

"You're overthinking it," Cristina stated. "Totally. And I have to work. But if you really want to run over there and check, I'll cover you."

Meredith sighed. "You know me. You know my intuition."

Christina laughed. "Go. I'll cover you."

Meredith hopped back into the elevator and rode it down to her car.

Meredith parked in front of her own house before walking the couple doors down to Addison's. "Five minutes," she muttered to herself. "Five minutes, and I will have done my good deed, gotten the juju, felt better about the whole thing. Five minutes."

The lights were on in the front room, but the curtains were drawn. Meredith tried to peer inside through the door window, but it was too dusty. She knocked three times, and waited. Nothing. Knocked again. Still nothing.

"Come on, Addison. I know you're in there," she said through the door. "Open up, I have to get back to work!"

Meredith knocked again, and there was still no answer. She went down off of the front porch and walked around to the back door. Surprisingly, it wasn't locked. She cracked it open and yelled, "Hello?"

Meredith took two steps in the door. "Addison? Are you here? Hello?"

When she came around the corner of the breakfast bar, she found Addison on the floor. Silent. And she wasn't moving.


	3. I Will Be Your Person

Meredith rode in the ambulance with Addison, of the strong impression that Addison wouldn't want to, and shouldn't have to, be alone. Addison was just laying there on the stretcher, not responding. It was a weird perspective for Meredith to have some she knew in front of her rather than a faceless patient, so to speak. Meredith was so in shock, she made no move to help the paramedics. She sat on the bench beside Addison, holding her hand and trying to will her back to life.

Addison didn't look all that wonderful. There was a lot of blood, a lot of bruises. The paramedics had ripped open her shirt as they were trying to examine her lifeless form, checking for injuries. _She wouldn't like that, _Meredith thought, _lying there naked like, exposed. I wonder how long she was laying there like that? Alone…I wonder if she was scared. I would be scared. I mean…she was supposed to be gone, right? So what if we had all assumed she was gone? What if nobody had found her? What if?_

Meredith didn't realize how tightly she was squeezing Addison's hand until she snapped out of her reverie. "I'm sorry, Addison," she whispered. "I'm so sorry." Meredith didn't know what else she could say. She felt like crying, but she wanted to be strong for Addison.

The ambulance pulled into the emergency bay at Seattle Grace, and Meredith was out with the stretcher as soon as the doors open. The paramedics were relaying the vitals to the waiting doctors, and Meredith was still so abuzz that she didn't realize Bailey was there until she starting running along with her.

"Grey, what happened?"

Meredith shook her head. "I don't know. I had a feeling this morning, I went to her house…I found her like this." Meredith fought back the tears, still fighting to be strong for the woman who so obviously needed her to be, and not wanting to lose it in front of her former boss.

Bailey met Meredith's eyes over the stretcher as they pulled into the trauma room. "Does Derek know?"

Meredith shook her head. "Not yet. But I'm staying her, Dr. Bailey, I have to help. I need to be here."

Bailey nodded. "That's fine. She needs us, Grey. More than us. I paged the Chief, he's on his way down."

They transferred Addison off of the stretcher, and Bailey began examining her. "Page Dr. Torres," she told Meredith, and Meredith ran quickly to do as she asked.

Meredith came back and began carefully cleaning off the blood, when she noticed that through the swelling, Addison's eyes were open. "Addison?" she asked. "Can you hear me?"

"Meredith?" The words came out dry and cracked, as if her throat hadn't seen water in several days.

Bailey froze at the word. "Addison, it's Miranda. And Meredith. We're both here. Can you tell us what happened?"

"I…" Addison tried to pull herself up, but couldn't seem to lift her head.

"It's okay, Addison," Meredith said, grabbing her hand again. "It's going to be okay."

"I can't…breathe…hurts."

"What hurts, Addison?" Bailey asked. "Talk to me."

Addison slipped into unconsciousness again.

"Dr. Bailey, what can I do?" Meredith asked, at last unable to stop the flow of tears. "We can't lose her."

"Her stats are dropping, we need to intubate," Bailey said, beginning the action before she was even finished with her sentence. Bailey had to force her hands to steady, to stop the shaking. This was her friend, her co-worker, a strong woman. And she was lying there on that table. It could have been any of them. But it was Addison.

At that moment, the Chief came into the trauma room with Callie Torres at his side. And right behind them was Derek.

"What's going on? It's Addison? What happened?"

The Chief held up a hand to stop Derek before he reached the table. "I don't want you here, Shepherd, your emotions will cloud you,"

"No, it won't. I can do this," Derek insisted. "I need to do this."

"You need to step back," the Chief answered. "We are going to work on her, and we are going to fix her, but I need for you to step away."

Derek met Meredith's eyes as he backed away, the tears glistening on her cheeks mirroring his own. Derek stepped out into the hall, sliding down against the wall. The doctors kept on working on their peer, doing everything in their power to heal her brokenness. Meredith kept right on holding Addison's hand, because somebody had to be there. Somebody had to hold Addison in the world, somebody had to be her person. And if that somebody was to be Meredith, if Meredith was to be Addison's person…Meredith was okay with that.


	4. What's Wrong With Me?

Meredith and Derek stood side by side at the window to Addison's room. "Has she been awake at all?" Derek asked.

Meredith sighed. "She fades in and out, but she's not really talking to anybody. She's probably still in shock, at least mentally."

Derek nodded.

"But she's strong, Derek. She'll be okay. She's breathing on her own. We fixed her up as best we could. She just has a lot to deal with, and that'll take time, I think."

"I know, Mer. I know."

Meredith reached out to take his hand, but he pulled away. "Not now, Meredith, I can't do this. I can't be there…I need to think." Tears glimmered in his eyes as he turned away from her, slipping through nurses to disappear around the corner.

Looking in through the blinds, Meredith noticed Addison awake. She slipped into the room and went to her bedside. "Addison? It's Meredith."

Addison's eyes slowly locked on to Meredith's voice, shifting towards her. "Meredith?"

"Yeah." _Oh my God, _Meredith thought, _we have never really been that close, but we're connected now, and she needs me, and I have no bloody idea what I'm doing and…_"How are you feeling?" she said out loud.

Addison stared blankly at her, absolutely no sign of expression on her battered face.

"I know," Meredith answered herself, pulling up a chair, "that was a stupid question. I'm sorry."

Addison grabbed on to Meredith's hand before she could offer it. "I'm…not," she whispered.

Meredith leaned closer. "Not what, sweetie?"

Addison struggled to take a deep breath, trying to push past the pain. "Feeling. I'm…not…feeling."

Meredith was at a loss for words.

"I'm not feeling," Addison repeated, a little stronger now. "I don't think…I don't think I can."

"Okay," Meredith answered.

"Tell me…what…What's wrong with me?"

Meredith reached for her chart of the end of the bed. "Honestly? I mean, you have a few broken ribs. There was a lot of internal bleeding, you were…"

"Not that," Addison interrupted. "Not that…"

Meredith shook her head. "I don't understand, I'm sorry, I…"

"I need to know why…why he hurt…me…"

_Oh God, the rape, she knows, I don't know what to say, I don't know what to say. She needs somebody else, anybody else, why am I here, why me, I…_"I can't answer that, sweetie, I don't know the answer."

Addison was crying softly, still holding Meredith's hand, and she turned her face away. Meredith used a damp sponge from the bedside to wipe Addison brow, brushing her hair out of her eyes. "It's will be okay, Addison, you'll be okay."

"No…"

"Yes," Meredith insisted. "Yes. I'll be your person, I will not leave your side. I will help you, you will be okay. You will be okay," she repeated. "You have to believe that."

Addison's gentle crying moved into shaking sobs, and Meredith moved onto the bed beside her. Meredith held her, hugged her, as gently as possible. "You'll be okay. Just hang on, Addison, hang on, and we'll get you through it. We'll get you through it." Addison slipped into sleep again, and Meredith gently eased her back to the pillow before returning to the hallway.

Derek was waiting by the nurse's station. "You are good with her, Mer. You're great with her. I don't know how…I couldn't."

"I know," Meredith said, meeting his gaze. "You couldn't."

Derek was taken aback. "I…"

"She needs somebody. I know her pain, I know what she's gong through, I know how she feels. And I know that she needs somebody, because I know what it's like to not have anybody."

Derek broke away from her gaze.

"I saw your tears, and I know that you care, and you should care, but you aren't there. I would like to think that you would be there for me, if I was in that bed, you would be there. I would like to think that you would always hold my hand. But you wouldn't. You couldn't. And I can't anymore, Derek, I can't. You have to be consistent, Derek, she's your ex-wife. You should be there. And you were there...and you ran away."

"Meredith, I…"

She shook her head. "I can't, Derek," she said, grabbing a cup of water from the dispenser before turning back to him. "I need someone who will be strong and who will be there, and I need someone to count on." She walked back across the hall towards Addison's room, pausing in the doorway. "To be honest, Derek, right now…There are more important things at stake than you and me."

Meredith turned and walked back into her friend's room, leaving Derek staring after her.


	5. These Tears I Cry

Addison was propped up in bed, staring down at her food tray. It was typical hospital food, all blended together on the plate. It smelled about as appealing as it tasted. Unsure as to whether or not she could even keep it down, Addison pushed the tray aside and decided not to take a chance. Eating would take effort and spirit, and she had neither.

The view outside her window was dull and dreary, filled with the usual Seattle rain. Addison couldn't name a single part of her body that didn't hurt. Every time she moved, there was another twinge, and every shot of pain brought her thoughts back to the thing that she didn't want to be thinking about. It hurt right down to the heart, and Addison felt like her heart was completely shattered.

A few tears escaped down her cheeks as Callie stuck her head into the room. "Hey, Addie, you hanging in there?"

Addison fiercely wiped away the tears before Callie could notice them. She nodded slowly, not trusting herself to answer.

"I just dropped in to say I was thinking of you, but I've got to bolt up to surgery. Okay if I drop in and say hi again later?"

Addison nodded again, and Callie was gone as if she had never even been there. She curled up in a ball on the bed as best she could among the lines and wires, and she struggled to just keep breathing. Even worse than the physical pain were the tortured thoughts that were swimming inside of her head. Trying to keep them out was futile, and she let the wall fall as the sobs overtook her.

Meredith fiddled with the straw in her soda. Izzie and Cristina were seated across the cafeteria table staring at her, waiting for her to speak. But the right words didn't seem to be coming.

"Is Addison going to be okay?" Izzie questioned. "I wanted to visit her, but I was afraid she'd be upset."

"Physically," Meredith stated, "she's getting better. Mentally…I don't know. But I think I'm supposed to be her person."

"Like you've been my person?" Cristina replied.

"Kind of. She needs somebody to help her, somebody who understands. And I do. So I need to be there."

"What do you mean, you understand? Were you…" Cristina's voice trailed over before the end of the sentence, but the meaning was still clear.

Meredith shook her head. "I don't want to talk about it. Not now."

"But I'm your person," Cristina insisted. "You're her person, and you're my person, and I'm your person. Someone has to be there for you too, Mer."

"And we're here," Izzie interjected.

"I know." Meredith threw all her garbage on her tray. "I just can't talk about it. And I need to get back."

"Okay," Cristina hesitated, "I love you, Mer."

Meredith tossed her trash in the bin and left the cafeteria.

Addison was facing the wall when Meredith came in, her shoulders shaking with silent sobs. Not knowing what to say, Meredith crossed the room and gently laid a hand on Addison's shoulder before perching on the edge of the bed. Addison was totally lost in her tears and gave no sign at all the she knew Meredith was present. Meredith rubbed Addison's back as she cried, trying to contain her own tears at the other woman's pain.

The crying ceased, and Addison lay silent for several minutes without moving. So Meredith said the one thing that she'd always wished someone would say to her back then, "It's not your fault, Addison. It's not your fault."

Addison shuddered, and turned her body so that she could see Meredith.

"It's not your fault," Meredith said assertively.

Addison just shook her head. "I don't get it," she whispered. "Why me?"

"Why me?" Meredith shot back.

It took Addison several seconds to process, but she suddenly understood what Meredith was saying. "You too…"

"A long time ago," Meredith answered with a nod. "And I don't know why, and I don't know the answers to any of the questions, even though I wish I did. But I understand pain. And I don't think you should be alone."

"I came home and went to the fridge for a soda," Addison mumbled, so soft that Meredith could barely catch it. "I came in…and he must have been there. I never saw him coming…I never saw…"

Addison was crying again, nearing sobs between the words. Meredith reached for her hand and squeezed it as tightly as she could, not wanting to interrupt. This was the first that Addison had spoken of it at all, and she needed to be free to let it out.

"He was…hitting me, over and over. I fell back, I hit my head on the counter…He had me on the ground, and…he was hitting me, and…" It was too much, too overwhelming, and Addison couldn't continue.

Meredith rubbed her hand and let her cry. "You don't need to keep going. It's okay."

"He…raped me…Meredith…he…And then he went to get a glass of water. He came back, and then he grabbed me by the hair and slammed my head into the tile again and again…and then nothing. Nothing. I didn't fight him, I should have fought him, and I just need to know why…"

"We'll get you through this, Addison, I promise."

Addison sighed, a couple stray tears tracking down the side of hair face and into her pillow. "I just…I feel like I'm totally lost, like I've lost everything, like…I've been erased. I'm never going to be the same."

Bailey came into the room and sat down in the chair on the other side of the bed. "Hi, Addison," she said.

Totally exhausted by even the partial sharing of her ordeal, Addison only managed a shaky smile towards Bailey. Over her gaze, Bailey took a closer look at Meredith's face. "Get out," she mouthed, "take a break."

Meredith nodded and slipped out of the room, hardly making it into the stairwell before she slid to the floor and her own tears escaped. Tears mostly for Addison, and for all of the pain that she was feeling, but a few for herself as well…for the time so many years ago.


	6. You Won't Ever Be Ready

Miranda Bailey poured Addison a glass of water from the pitcher by the bed and helped her sit up to drink it. "On a scale of one to ten, how's the pain?"

Addison sighed, taking another sip of the water. Miranda could see her hands shaking severely as she clutched at the cup, and she reached her own hand out to steady Addison's around the cup. "It hurts to breathe. And crying doesn't feel too great either."

"I'm sorry."

"I've got broken ribs, and sewed up cuts…and they're going to heal, Bailey. They're going to heal…but I won't. Ever." Addison looked away at her last words, allowing Miranda to take the cup and place it back on the nightstand.

"Oh, that's not true, Addison. We'll take good care of you. And I'll kick the ass of anyone who tried to hurt you, and you know that."

Addison forced a half smile on her face, as best she could amidst the swelling on her face that wouldn't go away. "I'm trying…" she whispered.

"I know. But we need to talk about something," Bailey said hesitantly.

"I don't think I like this," Addison moaned.

"When we examined you…in the trauma room," Bailey started, "Addison…somebody hurt you."

Addison tried to stay calm, forcing back the tears.

"You weren't awake, and we did a full examination…and the rape kit was positive," Bailey continued.

Addison began to cry again, softly, and Bailey grabbed her hand.

"You're a doctor, Addison, and you know that there are times when we have to involve the authorities, and this was one of those." Bailey's normally strong demeanor seemed to be crumbling in the presence of Addison's tears. "They came to talk to you, but you weren't awake yet. They're back today, and they want you to give a statement."

Addison shook her head. "No," she said forcefully, trying to wipe away the tears. "I can't."

"Addison," Bailey tried to catch her eye. "You should. They can help you. They can make you feel safe."

Addison turned back towards the wall. "Send Meredith back in before them. I want Meredith here."

"You got it," she answered, getting up and walking out the door.

Meredith blew her nose into an extremely rough piece of paper towel before using another damp piece of towel to dap away the tearstains under her eyes. She didn't notice Miranda Bailey standing behind her until she turned to throw the toweling in the trash.

"You okay, Grey?" Bailey asked, much gentler than her normal tone.

Meredith nodded. "Yeah. It's just hard. I needed to get away for a few minutes."

"You're strong, Grey. Stronger than I've probably given you credit for."

Meredith realized that she was probably never going to get a better compliment from Bailey. "Thank you, Doctor Bailey."

"Anyway…Addison's asking for you. The police are waiting outside her room to talk to you, but she wanted to see you first. Try and convince her that it's okay to talk to them?"

Meredith nodded. "I will."

"And take care of her…I don't know why, but you seem to have a way with her."

Meredith moved past Miranda and went back down the hall to Addison's room.

Addison was facing the doorway, waiting for her. "They want me to talk to the police…" she whispered.

"I know, sweetie, I heard. But I think it could be good. And I'll be right here with you the whole time. You can squeeze my hand as hard as you want."

"I'm not ready," Addison insisted. "I'm not."

"And you probably won't ever be," Meredith said honestly. "But you have to push through it and get it done, and then it will be over."

Addison thought about it for several seconds before finally agreeing. "Okay. You can tell them to come in. But you have to be here."

"I will, honey, I'm not going anywhere."

The police entered the room at Meredith's prompting, taking the two chairs on either side of the bed. Meredith sat on the edge of the bed, ignoring the stabs of her friend's fingernails digging into her palm. Addison squeezed even harder as the first detective asked his question.

"Ms…Montgomery? Can you tell us what happened?"

Addison locked onto Meredith's face, trying to choke back her impending panic.

"It's okay," Meredith murmured under her breath. "It's okay."

Addison took a breath, and opened her mouth to tell her story for the second time that day, as best she could through the tears.


	7. One Day At A Time

"Meredith, I want to get out of here," Addison stated. "I have to get out of here."

"Are you sure that's a good idea? I mean, you're still healing."

"All I'm doing here is thinking. I'm thinking about what happened, and I don't want to think about it anymore right now, I can't think about it…I just wanna go home. You have to get them to let me go."

"I talk to Bailey and we'll see, I guess. You're sure you want to get out of here?" Meredith asked.

"People walk by this room, and I know them, and they stare at me, Meredith…I…I can't be here anymore. I just want to go home, you know?"

"I get it," Meredith nodded.

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Addison was silent on the car ride to her house. It was little unnerving being in the real world again. Everything seemed so bright and loud that all she could do was stare at her lap. As the miles passed by and Meredith attempted to make small talk, Addison began to regret her decision to leave the safety of her room at Seattle Grace.

The car came to a stop in front of Addison's house, and she struggled with whether or not she had the strength to go in the door. _This is it, _she thought, _this is where it's all going hit me._ It really hit her yet. She had cried. She had cried more tears than she had ever cried in her entire life. But coming back to her house, where it happened, made it full circle.

Meredith turned off the engine. "Are you ready?"

"I think I can do it on my own," Addison said, her voice betraying that she really didn't feel that way at all.

"Maybe so, sweetie, but you shouldn't have to."

Addison remained frozen in her seat as Meredith came around and opened her door.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Meredith asked.

"No," Addison whispered. "But I should…right?"

"You could stay at my house for awhile. It's not like we don't have enough rooms."

Unbuckling her seatbelt, Addison slowly eased herself from the vehicle, trying not to jostle her broken ribs. She took Meredith's arm and allowed herself to be led into the house.

The first room wasn't so bad. It was the living room, and it was her space. Her purse was there, right on the table where she had left it. Addison began to think that it wouldn't be so bad, being back in her house. And then they hit the kitchen.

Addison didn't realize how badly she was swaying until Meredith's arm abruptly tightened on hers. Her legs grew very shaky quite suddenly, and she found herself dragging Meredith down to the floor as they folded underneath her.

"Addie? Are you okay?" Meredith let go of Addison's arm and sat directly facing her.

Addison leaned against the door frame into the kitchen trying to catch her breath. "I'm beginning to think this was a bad idea, me coming here…so soon…I don't think I can do this."

"But…look around."

Addison looked around, confused.

"Don't you see? I mean, other than a little almost fainting…you're okay. You're a strong woman, Addison. You're going to be okay."

"It was right there," Addison pointed.

Meredith followed her gaze, noticed the open can of soda pooled across the floor.

"I was there when he first hit me," she whispered, a single tear trailing down her cheek, "and I never saw it coming."

Meredith stayed silent, allowing her friend time to think.

"It hurt so bad, every blow…and when he was…"

She didn't have to finish. Meredith knew exactly what she meant.

"That hurt the worst."

"I know," Meredith agreed. "I know."

"And I shouldn't be alive…I don't know why I'm still here, Meredith."

"It wasn't your time yet. Just like it wasn't my time so many years ago…because if it wouldn't have happened to me, then…I never would have been there for you." Meredith got to her feet and extended her hand to Addison. "Let's get you out of here, okay? I'll take you to my house and get you settled in bed, resting, and I can come back later for some of your stuff."

"How do I make it okay?" Addison asked, digging for the strength to get to her feet again.

"You're already getting there, Addison. You're already moving forward. Don't you see?"

"But how can I be moving forward when it still hurts this much?"

"I don't know what to say…other than…It gets easier. I guess that's just it." Meredith paused, thinking. "One day at a time, Addison. One day at a time, one week at a time, one month at a time…and eventually…you won't think about it everyday. And it will be work, don't get me wrong. It will be long, and hard. But you'll fight through, and I'll be there, and your friends will be there…and you will make it through."

"You promise? Honestly?"

"Yes," Meredith said firmly. "I promise. Now let's get out of here for now, okay? Come back when you're a little bit stronger?"

Addison nodded. "One day at a time, one week at a time, one month at a time," she repeated. "Starting with one day at a time, because I can't think much farther ahead than that."

"And I will always be there to help you through. I will always hold your hand, I will always be your friend, whenever you need me. Okay?"

Addison smiled the first real smile she had smiled in over a week. "Okay. Let's get out of here," she said.

The two friends locked up Addison's old house, and walked down the street to Meredith's. Addison was really, truly starting over.


End file.
